Don’t Quit Your Daydream, Girl! By Rachela Farella

for educators for girls empowerment leaders for parents for teens Aug 10, 2023

 

Snap out of it!

Stop daydreaming!

Stop staring into space!

(Snap! Snap! Snap) HELLLLLLO! 

 

How many times can you say that you’ve had your share of broken daydreams?  That very moment when your daydream was just about to go from bleh to amazing, and then suddenly,  SNAP! Someone snaps you out of it and you suddenly feel your cheeks flushing with colour and your elbow getting knocked off the table?  Yeah, I know… fanfreakntastic!

Can you remember what you were thinking about? Or better yet, who were you thinking about? Now, how about you close your eyes, and try and go back to that very moment and try and think back to who you were in that daydream? Were you a pop star? A doctor? An explorer?

When I think back to my childhood days; my dad used to always call me a dreamer. I always had a new idea, the next greatest plan, or a new hobby that I wanted to start. But in the end, all they seemed to be, were little broken daydreams. Or so I thought. Had someone told me today, that each and every one of my daydreams would have led me to my path of self-discovery, I wonder what paths I would have taken during my teenage and adult years. I wonder if I would have experienced more wonderful and amazing opportunities in my life. But mainly, I would have never allowed seven year old and twelve year old me to stop believing in them. In fact, today, at forty-one years of age, I will be the first person to scream and shout,  and truly encourage every single girl out there, to keep believing in her daydreams. And it doesn’t matter if it’s a quick little moment or a-you zoned out into the universe type of daydream; both will find it’s way and take you to a moment in time where you’re living, doing and experiencing something great.

So what am I referring to. I am talking about those instantaneous moments where your mind suddenly stops and starts envisioning all of the endless possibilities of what if’s,  I wonder how’s, or the I wish I could, moments of excitement for our awesome future selves.Those are the moments that I wish I paid more attention to growing up.  And rather then seeing my daydreams as a negative annoyance in my childhood years, I now know how beneficial and important they truly can be for all young girls.   

So now, let’s get to the fun part. 

Can you stop and think about any of your daydreams?

If you’re a teenager or an adult reading this, how many of those have actually happened or morphed into an actual “dream come true” moment in your life?

I have had so many daydreams in the past forty-one years that I truly believe that they were all meant to lead me to where I am supposed to be. Right here, right now, today and tomorrow, leading all young girls to become empowered and fearlesslykind humans. 

So, here is my story...

Four year old me always daydreamed about becoming a hairdresser. But it wasn’t until I was in possession of my first pair of real scissors (right before my pre-kindergarten photos), when I knew that- that was definitely an epic fail. Chop chop. Goodbye bangs. Hello crooked hairline. But who could have imagined that my twin sister would become a really successful hairdresser. Maybe my energy manifested that for her instead.

Many moons later, seven year old me wanted to become a teacher. Playing school was always a fun activity. But like most dreams, that too faded away. However, for the past seventeen years; I’ve been working in the education system, helping many young students along the way. So who knows, I probably manifested that part of my journey without even realizing it too.

Then there was twelve year old me. The young me who discovered that I had a love and passion for the spotlight. Between being a dancer from a very young age and being part of the drama club in high school, I knew that I was destined to become an actress. (Keep reading and you’ll see how I manifested this many moons later).

Then I turned sixteen, and yet again, another daydream pushed aside due to the reality of college applications, submission letters and realistic expectations. Sixteen year old me had to really sit down and ask my younger self, what was it that I truly wanted to do with my life. And when it was time to fill out those college applications, sixteen year old me chose the ‘safer’ choice. The choice that made more practical sense and the choice that would lead me to be and feel ‘happy’. Or so I thought.

And while many opportunities came and went, there was always the feeling of being lost in the pit of my stomach. And today, if I had a wish for my younger self, it would be to ALWAYS choose your first choice, no matter how terrifying that choice may seem. Because while I did choose the safer option, it wasn’t the one that truly made my heart happy. I’ve learned that your first choice which is always going to be your scariest choice, will always be your BEST choice. And yes, no matter how scary or risky it may seem. As young girls and even as women, we tend to let fear get in the way of our choices. And what this does, is it creates a wall for us to see beyond that fear. It blurs our vision to see who your best empowered future self should be.  

So now twenty something years later, there I was. Still confused and uncertain about my career choices and with a whole lot of questions still hanging over my head.

Now let’s go back and revisit my twelve year old daydream. Yes, the one where I wanted to become an actress. To be part of the spotlight. And to be truly honest, I never let that dream fade away. It was always tucked away in the back of my mind just waiting to become my reality. Now, while that dream never really morphed into reality, I was still determined to make it happen, even if it was only a dream for a day.

When I was twenty seven years old, I did what everyone saw as the impossible. I was determined to turn my daydream into a reality. And while people thought I was delusional, I didn’t let that stop me. I did whatever I had to, to make it happen. I contacted who ever I could think of, called who ever I knew to help me find one contact. Just one little contact who could get this rolling for me. And I did it. I managed to get a job as an extra on one of my favourite television shows. It was my dream. Ask anyone, they’ll agree with me on this one. It was as though I silently manifested this dream for so long, that at twenty seven years old, after 9 years, it was meant to happen. And I am so glad that I never let go of that dream, because that day will always remain as one of the most incredible experiences of my life.

Life as an adult is like a never-ending tale of decisions and choices. And while some choices come rather easily than others, the right ones will always find a way to keep you up at night. And if there is one lesson that I have acquired and kept close to my heart all of these years; it is that, the scariest decision that you’ll never make will be the one that will keep you up at night. It will haunt you for as long as it needs to, until you finally realize, that it has always been what’s meant for you.  

And one of life greatest failures, is believing when they say, don’t do it. Choose the safer choice. Choose what will keep you safe and settled. But while we’re out there doing that,  we are pushing aside what’s really meant for us. And as a grown woman, I can certainly say that they were wrong.

They were wrong to make us believe that our daydreams were a waste of time and space. And it was awful to make us girls think that being a dreamer is the same as carrying wasted thoughts. Because it’s not. Daydreams are the stepping stones to our future happy selves. We need those little thought fragments to help us see what is waiting for us out there in this big chaotic world. They are the silent words from the universe telling us not to let go, because we do really need something to hold on to.

But most importantly, we need all of these little special somethings to believe in. Because without our magical daydreams, what do we really have left to believe in? Safe choices? The right choice? The best choice. Why weren’t we told to choose the choice that made our soul feel it’s purest form of happiness-despite the fear that came along with it? Why have we been lied to and conditioned to believe what was false all along.

So today, I am boycotting the notion that we have to choose the safer choice. And today, I encourage all you young girls out there, to keep on daydreaming. Keep on believing in the power of magic. But mostly, keep searching for your ah-ha moment. Because somewhere deep down in each of those little moments- the universe is telling you something. She is telling you that you are on your way to your destined path. Your final chapter. And the second you start believing and manifesting that thought into your present life, that is when everything will start to shift and change. That is when you will finally start to make your daydreams come true.

So, what do I wish to tell my twelve year old self along with all twelve year old little girls reading this?

Never quit or stop believing in the magic of your daydreams. For every single one of those magical moments will soon grow into the healthiest and happiest version of YOU." 

 

 

~Rachela Farella - FearlesslyGiRL Facilitator & Founder of FearlesslyKiND Girl 

Follow Rachela on Instagram here!

 

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